ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT

ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT
ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT
After a number of recent conversations and happenings, coupled with self reflection, I think the biggest change in my life over the past number of years has been an attitude adjustment.
Years ago, it was far too easy to fall into the negative.
One of my symptoms was frequently knocking others, finding the bad in them. Another was a sense of gloom that could take over the sunniest day. The gloom through me frequently into procrastination, I just couldn’t get things done unless my back was against a wall, and even then I was often late with “stuff”.
I could go on, and I know many can add to this. Today I know my problem was “attitude”.
Yes I had other issues. Safe to say I had an outward big ego coupled with inner fear and self loathing. What a dangerous combination. I created my own “Disney World” and found both mood altering substances and behaviours that would, for a short period, allow me to escape the real world and all its’ tough situations and live in my fantasy land. I could look into the future and see grandiose things happening-fame and fortune and the admiration of others coming my way. But man, truth of the matter was I did not want to deal with the real issue-me and my attitude toward life.
I have a good friend an author by the name of Paul McCabe who wrote a book of simple truths worth reading-“Feed the Good Dog”. One thing that Paul has drilled into me is a huge truth; “Life is tough”.
In years gone by, life was tough and I chose to escape to Disney World. Upon reflection, I would have to say the past decade has been as tough, maybe even tougher, yet I deal with it far differently and am an optimistic person who gets enjoyment out of nearly every day.
What happened?
With the fullness of hind sight, I can say simply that I have undergone a major change of attitude and address the causes of my problems. In doing this, I have been free of my “addictions” for an extended period of time and have a whole new set of skills in my life tool box that I can draw on.
There is an old saying; gratitude is an attitude and this is now a part of my subconscious daily living. Life remains with its difficulties but when the darkness starts up inside of me (and it does) I quickly focus on the many things I have to be grateful for. Each of us is capable of finding them if we learn how to find them! So I try to live daily with an attitude of gratitude and this has caused a major attitude adjustment in my life.
What a blessing to appreciate the good that has been bestowed on me; truly an unmerited gift but a gift I accept with thanks.
There was a process that I learned from others that brought me from a negative place and trips to “Disney World” to a place where I see sunshine just about daily. The attitude adjustment brought about with “guided growth” allows me to live in the real world and deal soberly with problems that used to baffle me.
Life at certain times remains tough, but from the tools gained from a variety of “life coaching” experiences, I live my days today with a whole new positive take on life.
If you look at life through anis, all you see is brown stuff. Today I like the place I look at life from, and it impacts on all around me. Most importantly, I like living in my own skin. This is a major positive attitude adjustment. (www.hopeserenity.ca / www.coached-to-success.com)

A SMILE (fiction-OK love?)

A SMILE (fiction-OK love?)
A LITTLE SMILE
My wife was driving when she saw the flash of a traffic camera. She figured that her picture had been taken for exceeding the limit even though she knew that she was not speeding.
She went around the block and passed the same spot, driving even more slowly, but again the camera flashed. Now she began to think that this was quite funny, so she drove even slower as she passed the area once more, but the traffic camera again flashed. She tried a fourth and fifth time with the same results and was now laughing as the camera flashed while she rolled past at a snail's pace.
Two weeks later, she got five tickets in the mail for driving without a seat belt.
You can't fix stupid. (www.hopeserenity.ca)

ASKING FOR HELP

ASKING FOR HELP
ASKING FOR HELP
We roll into a new week, and I look forward to it! Interesting things happened last week, one in particular that reminded me that I have no control over people in my life, particularly my adult children.
While I can’t control them, I am amazed, with all the work I have done on myself, how much their actions can still hurt! But with the help of a power greater than me and a little time we do move on. The space in my head has value, and there’s no point in letting things that don’t pay rent to occupy that space.
Another great reminder, it is very difficult for others to ask for help. Some do when there back is up against a wall; others never do and generally suffer because of their pride and false ego.
I can well remember the time in my life that asking for help in many areas was a very difficult, if not impossible, task. I was one of those who whose back was forced up against a wall. I was about to lose the things that were most important to me; not material things but relationships that meant everything.
It goes without saying; I had lost a good relationship with myself many years ago.
It took a real act of courage on the part of my life partner to force me into action. I was a miserable person wallowing in self pity and remorse when I reached out for professional help.
Funny thing, when I finally swallowed my pride and checked my ego at the door, there was great help available, and in asking for it and taking action, I began to get my life back!
Try as I did, I could not fix myself and it took “help” from many others along with personal action to get things going in a positive direction.
This weekend, I was reminded by a couple of very close friends on how difficult it was to ask for help. Ironically, as I was at this very juncture of writing, the phone rang and another long time acquaintance called and reluctantly asked for help and stated that she had a real battle with her ego to ask! Things do happen in mysterious ways, and maybe the timing of your reading this blog will be just what you need at this moment.
The bottom line- if you’re feeling things closing in on you and your back is against the wall, swallow your pride, check your ego and reach out for help. It’s tough to do, it does require courage, but you will find help available and who knows, you might get to the life you truly deserve! (www.hopeserenity.ca)

अस्किंग फॉर हेल्प?

ASKING FOR HELP
We roll into a new week, and I look forward to it! Interesting things happened last week, one in particular that reminded me that I have no control over people in my life, particularly my adult children.
While I can’t control them, I am amazed, with all the work I have done on myself, how much their actions can still hurt! But with the help of a power greater than me and a little time we do move on. The space in my head has value, and there’s no point in letting things that don’t pay rent to occupy that space.
Another great reminder, it is very difficult for others to ask for help. Some do when there back is up against a wall; others never do and generally suffer because of their pride and false ego.
I can well remember the time in my life that asking for help in many areas was a very difficult, if not impossible, task. I was one of those who whose back was forced up against a wall. I was about to lose the things that were most important to me; not material things but relationships that meant everything.
It goes without saying; I had lost a good relationship with myself many years ago.
It took a real act of courage on the part of my life partner to force me into action. I was a miserable person wallowing in self pity and remorse when I reached out for professional help.
Funny thing, when I finally swallowed my pride and checked my ego at the door, there was great help available, and in asking for it and taking action, I began to get my life back!
Try as I did, I could not fix myself and it took “help” from many others along with personal action to get things going in a positive direction.
This weekend, I was reminded by a couple of very close friends on how difficult it was to ask for help. Ironically, as I was at this very juncture of writing, the phone rang and another long time acquaintance called and reluctantly asked for help and stated that she had a real battle with her ego to ask! Things do happen in mysterious ways, and maybe the timing of your reading this blog will be just what you need at this moment.
The bottom line- if you’re feeling things closing in on you and your back is against the wall, swallow your pride, check your ego and reach out for help. It’s tough to do, it does require courage, but you will find help available and who knows, you might get to the life you truly deserve! (www.hopeserenity.ca)

यू'रे बेत्टर थान यू थिंक!

YOU’RE BETTER THAN YOU THINK!
How many of us have truly healthy self-esteem (not big egos) and appreciate how good we really are?
Not many, most of us underestimate our real potential.
We are better than we know. If we can be made to see it, perhaps for the rest of our lives, we will be unwilling to settle for less.
-- Anonymous
We are wonderful, capable human beings worthy of love and happiness. We all have a gift to give the world that can't be duplicated. No one else is exactly like us; we are each unique. Hard to believe?
The problem is, we don't believe it. Most of us are used to thinking about all our negative qualities and become expert at putting ourselves down. We have a hard time believing and accepting our own goodness and gifts. Think about how you respond when given a compliment!
When we have a negative attitude, only one person can change it - us. We have the power to choose to change our thinking - if we want to. It takes a courageous person to risk getting positive and hopeful.
I had to reach out and get coaching help to make the changes I needed to make in my life and in my case this meant giving up chemical and behavioural addictions. It was tough, but then life is tough! It has been with it.
Today I can appreciate my goodness and accept love humbly. (www.hopeserenity.ca)

CONSCIENCE-FOUND IT?

CONSCIENCE-FOUND IT?

It was a very interesting day yesterday. A day where I had a wonderful opportunity to lunch with a psychiatrist associate, then golf with a business coach I have known for years, but never had the opportunity to spend one on one time with.

Upon reflection this morning, and looking at what has made the biggest shift inside of me over the years, I think it’s hearing my conscience.

I’ve always had one; it certainly made me feel really guilty for many years because I found ways not to listen. I learned, with training and mood altering substances and behaviors, I could make this “voice” a background, always there, but suppressed. I have no doubt that in my mind I created Disneyworld. Through what I know now to be insane behavior, I moved in to Disneyworld and convinced myself it was real. Can others relate?

In 1994, I had a moment of clarity. The small quiet voice that was always there roared out, “Listen to me before you lose even more!”

And for some reason, I not only heard it, I heeded it. A journey began.

Inside all of us is a small quiet voice. Call it conscience. Call it your source. Call it your higher power. Call it whatever you want, but learn to hear it.

Today, I make sure I get quiet time as part of my day. I have learned through training and practice to stop the squirrels from running in my head, to shut down the thoughts that are unconscious ego at play. In this still time, the small, quiet voice is heard.

To escape Disneyland, I have been living in the real world, I allow myself to feel my feelings, and others taught me to identify what they are. I can deal with external and internal pain without medicating. In areas where significant decision is required, I am more patient and allow myself to hear the quiet voice inside most of the time.

This came with spiritual awakening, and a realization that for all the many years I lived a life driven by self-will and low self-esteem, that there was a higher power that dwelt within and all around me.

We all have this small quiet voice within. I have heard others talk about imaginary objects on each shoulder in constant conflict. Others call it good and bad, devil and god, and so on. I really don’t care how it is described. I’m just grateful that I learned to listen to my conscience before I went down even lower!

The journey since has been great, living in the real world certainly has its problems, but to feel and be “in the game” is what is meant to be.

Have you found that small quit voice, do you take the quiet time to listen to your conscience?

व्व्व.होपेसेरेनिटी.ca

Blogging-Why??

Blogging-Why??

I have been journaling, and posting my journal as a blog for some time. Why?

I am a member of a group of coaches who can be found at Big Life.ws, and have been part of a share group about blogging. I am trying to put into practice what others are telling me about blogging. I look for the input of any and all that read the blog.

The advice put yourself out there; let people see who you are and what you’re about! I do try to do that.

I journal as a part of my journey of recovery from multiple addictions. It allows me to externalize on the outside what is going on in the inside, and keeps garbage from building up. I try to externalize feelings and thoughts. This is for my benefit.

I post my journal publicly for a few reasons.

Being public keeps me honest. What I put out there is available to people who know and trust me. I can’t afford to BS the troops.

I know I am not unique.

What I am going through is a journey that many others are taking. I benefit from the experience, strength and hope of others, and from feedback I get, I know my blogs at times are positive to others. This is a form of service.

I have gone through a major inspection of my life over the past year. I had a unique opportunity to really explore my purpose in life, and do something that can make a meaningful difference.

I have strong people skills, a world of life, business, and recovery experience, and a desire to help others succeed. I have always been a mentor and coach to others as part of who I am.

I have gone back to school to hone my coaching and mentoring skills and to learn. I have deepened my spiritual life considerably.

There is about 10% of the population affected by addictions. Many will not seek help and will remain in denial. There are many out there who want a confidential place to identify if they have a problem, and deal with it privately. There are great treatment centers out there. I offer an option to those who want confidentiality and are prepared to work. And the option is less expensive. With Addictions, I mentor people. I do not do pure coaching. And I know what I am doing.

I also have the training and knowledge to help people transform their lives by setting goals, thinking big, and applying the talents within to achieve a more abundant life-whether it is career or personal. Spiritual-not religious- awakening and awareness is a part of this process.

So I blog from a practical standpoint as a method of attracting people to my business because they want what I offer and have a good feel of who I am.

I will continue journaling and posting as part of my recovery. I also believe I provide a much needed service to others, and welcome new clients.

So there is the why! How about some feedback? I would love to make more of a positive difference!!